“There is no man living who isn’t capable of doing more than he thinks he can do.”

― Henry Ford

When was the last time you truly believed that you can do something epic?
When you felt that you’re capable of achieving something great?

Good ideas can be scary. Great ideas are straight up terrifying.
But why is it that every time our souls are set ablaze by a spark of passion, the second it fill us with energy – it ends up distinguished in a few minutes by thoughts like these:
“Be realistic!” – “Don’t be so naive…” – “The world doesn’t work this way“

Every one of these ideas, thoughts or dreams have the potential to change our lives in a way we can’t even begin to imagine, yet, they barely get to live another day.
Soon the excitement turns into anxiety, then we try to ignore the fire and pretend that it wasn’t even there in the first place.

Today, I’ll show you what happens when you do the opposite.

It was a usual Sunday, with only one task for the day:
Keep the promise I made.
Before things slipped for the tweede keer¹, I made a promise to the girl who showed me how Beautiful Life can be. Beautiful, with a capital B.
There weren’t any more days left to procrastinate – if I didn’t fulfill what I said today, the opportunity would pass, and there is no way on Earth I’ll ever become a hypocrite.

– A Man keeps his word, even if it’s not convenient or easy.
That’s my philosophy. It helps you look in the mirror without regret or shame. These two can easily ruin us mentally.

My promise was to give her something handmade – a lucky charm; that would protect her from troubles all the way while She is exploring Europe recklessly.

The last night we spent together She talked about being a Tiger, wild and impressive. She was waving with her hands (with a glass of wine in it) while her parents and I were listening to how this delicate, graceful being can identify with something so strong and magnificent.
The fire in her eyes was fierce, and we knew She wasn’t kidding.
So this morning I sat down to craft an Origami Tiger and decided to deliver it, regardless of what I’ll have to face.

Every single fold and crease I made was done with as much attention as there possibly can be. It didn’t matter how it turned out when it was finished, all that counts is that you put your heart and soul into it.
That’s the point of a handmade gift – to put a piece of you in it.

When I was done, it suddenly hit me:
There is no way I can get there to give it.
She lives in the middle of nowhere on the other side of the country, where public transport doesn’t exist and I had no car to go with.
“What if…? No, that’s too crazy, even for me… There is no way I could do it. But what if…“
I hit up google maps, put the address in and selected cycling.
“3 HOURS?! No fucking way…“
It would be 6 back and forth, 55 km each.

I never cycled more than 20 km under one sitting, and that was the deadliest day I’ve had when it comes to cycling. Walking wasn’t an option the next day.

“But what’s the alternative?“
Either this, or letting her go away without anything to help her on the trip.
If something happened to her, I would lose my shit.
So, still in doubt, I started to check out guides for long-distance cycling.

After reading a few articles on conserving energy and performance improving, I started to think that I can make at least the first half of the trip. The important part, that is. The way back wasn’t relevant, even if I had to stop every 10 minutes to let my legs rest a bit, because She would have her tiny piece of portable Luck and Safety.

Yet, I was still afraid that I wouldn’t make it.
This is when I reached into my wallet and took a coin out of it.
If it’s heads, the answer is yes, if it’s tails, forget it.
I tossed it, but my heart knew the answer before I flipped it on my wrist.
“I’m going to do it” – I whispered, and slowly lifted my palm to see what it is.
Heads. Tuurlijk².
Fate ruined the only excuse I could ever make.

In 10 minutes, I was on my way.

The only thing I didn’t take into account is that those guides were referring to bikes with the ability to do long distances.
What I had, on the other hand, is a granny bike that takes you to the closest grocery store if you’re lucky.

Beautiful, isn’t it?
Well, enjoy the trip, dummy.

The first 30 minutes was scary. New roads, fields and landscapes wherever I turned my cheeks. The idea was to avoid looking at my phone and remember the turns, so I wouldn’t have to look at a huge fucking clock saying “You’ll be doing this for another 2 and a half hours, bitch“

At 90 minutes my legs started burning, but I tried not to think about it.
“Just one more km. You can do that, it’s easy“
All I had to do is keep lying for another 90 minutes, so I could continue lying for another 180.
Legs – Brain
0 – 1

Occasionally I would stop to drink or shake my legs a bit.
I couldn’t rest for more than 3 minutes – my legs would use it as an excuse to call it quits and refuse to work for the rest of the day.

There was a point where I had to go through a forest, but the signal went away and the roads weren’t on the screen.
A few hikers made remarks as they passed me:
“A bicycle in the middle of the forest…what’s he doing?“
I wish I knew, dear Lady. I wish I did.

After wandering for 20 minutes around trees, wild pigs and bulls, who were calmly chewing grass next to me, I finally found my way out of the labyrinth.

At around 2/3 of the trip, there was a mural on one of the buildings.
It was astonishing. I couldn’t help but stop and eat a banana while I stare at it. This kind of art is very popular here, you can find them scattered all around the country. This particular beauty looked like this:

I was very close to make it, yet the last 40 minutes was heavy. My ass was numb and my legs were begging for mercy at every spin.
Soon, I started to think about the possibilities:
“Would her Dad be pissed? Not to the point where he would call the Police, but being arrested would be funny – especially if I could skip work the next day. Sounds like a win-win. Her Mom wouldn’t even be surprised by this. I don’t remember what she saw in my horoscope, but it surely covers even this. I should memorize a few Dutch sentences, just in case. Is there a chance that nobody is home at this point of the day?

These little thoughts kept me on auto-pilot, making me forget about my body. When I finally arrived to their place, I stopped for a second and started to think:

Every single event in my Life led up to this moment.
How crazy is it?
Maybe if the guy who bullied me in elementary school would’ve been sick on a certain Wednesday morning in 3rd grade, I would’ve had a great day and never in my Life would I come to the conclusion that I should move away. Or if my plane arrived on time in January without a delay, would that make me appear further on her list, and close the app before She gives her blue star to me? If our great great grandparents wouldn’t have been horny on that particular day, our Stories wouldn’t even exist.
There are endless things that could cause us not to ever meet.
But we did. Every single decision we made throughout the decades led to the only one outcome that allowed us to experience all this.
And now I’ve found myself cycling 3 hours to the middle of nowhere, just to break into a garden and give her a piece of paper.
“Wat een Leven³“

When my inner Socrates finally stopped talking, I quickly utilized the monkey blood in my veins and climbed in. From philosopher to villain in less than a minute.

There wasn’t a single car on the property.
“Drukke dag, éh?”⁴
Regardless, I walked up to the front door and knocked 3 times as if I was doing Trick or Treat.
No answer, no candies.
I pulled out a tea box, wrote her name on it, put it next to the doormat and left with a smile on my face.
It was both a relief and a pity that nobody saw me.
“What the reaction would’ve been?” This remains a mystery.
“I should’ve waved into the camera, at least” – I mumbled as I climbed out to the street
Nevertheless, it felt great.

This was the moment when I finally pulled out the earphone to fuel my way home. It was a tough trip in silence all the way, but now the music is gonna make it smooth sailing.

Cycling again was a lot easier than I thought it would be. The music definitely worked like magic. At one point, the song we once sang on the way home from the beach came up suddenly, and the memories hit me like the waves of the Sea on that particular day.
I was so happy; my legs actually forgot that they were in pain.
Those moments are forever preserved in History, and that is something no one can take away.

There was a point where I felt a little dizzy, so I stopped at the first bar and ordered a coffee. When nobody was watching, I stole a coaster from a tray (I’m such a criminal today), and wrote the date on the back of it.
Memories are the treasures of old age, and I wanted to make sure that I have a souvenir that reminds me of how silly I was in my twenties.

After sitting on the bike for the last time today, it was easier to do the remaining 2 hours and 30 minutes. Only at the last 20 kilometers I got to the point where I almost fainted and rolled into a ditch, but I knew that if the previous 90 didn’t stop me, then nothing will.
All I needed was a little faith and a touch of insanity, and the outcome is one of my greatest victories.

When I finally got home, I couldn’t believe it. The second my feet touched the ground, it wouldn’t hold my weight. I had to crawl up the stairs, literally.
When a friend heard how I cycled 110 km under 7 hours today, he called me immediately, and I picked up shouting this at him:
–VANAF NU, BEN IK EEN ECHTE NEDERLANDER!⁵
“Bro, you are fucking insane…”
– Dat weet ik ⁶
“Why the fuck would you do this?“

I couldn’t explain. It was simply the right thing, there is no logic behind it.

Life never makes sense in the moment anyway. Not to the point where you’re certain about everything. That’s the Magic of it. Only as you age, does the bigger picture reveal the answers you’ve been seeking so eagerly.
Just follow your Heart, there is no other GPS like it.
It will take you to places you’ve always wanted to see, and will give you all the strength you need if you let it. It will guide you through even the toughest days. Trust it, even if it hurts deeply. In the end, that’s one thing you’ll never regret doing.

When I went to bed, my mind was still buys with the thoughts of today. I was just laying there, staring at the ceiling.
“Will I always be this crazy?” – I whispered, as my eyes started closing
Then I smiled and fell asleep.

“The only way of finding the limits of the possible is
by going beyond them into the impossible.”

– Arthur C. Clarke

Take care, as always.
Erik

27.10.2019 – Day 279

[Dutch Dictionary]
Tweede keer 1 – Second time
Tuurlijk ² – Of course
Wat een Leven ³ – What a Life
Drukke dag, éh? ⁴ – Busy day, huh?
Vanaf nu, ben ik een echte Nederlander ⁵ – From now on, I’m officially Dutch
Dat weet ik ⁶ – I know that