It’s been almost 2 years.

If I had to draw a conclusion based on these 700 days I spent living here, it would be this:
It’s too good here. Living in the Netherlands is just extraordinarily comfy.

That might sound like a blessing, but in many cases it’s actually the opposite.

People are extremely unmotivated, mainly because “they have everything”
They comfortably sit in the middle of the lifestyle scale.
Not having to worry about falling below/giving up on a certain degree of comfort and [Life] quality, nor aiming for (or wanting) bigger things, because what they have is just enough to satisfy their needs.

If you look at this graph, you can clearly see that the Netherlands is the least problematic.
It’s not that Life is perfect here, rather that they’re excellent at eliminating misery.
Hence the lowest score on “Low Life Quality”

And now I am, too, a hostage of this massive ease.

Back in January 2019 – when I moved here from Hungary – I was mesmerized by how easy it is to get anything you need.
Today, I’m used to it. Basically I expect it.
The country spoiled me completely, making me less ambitious, less tolerant and more lazy.

I haven’t even been officially working since last December (1 whole year) and Life is pretty chill.
In Hungary, my friends are forced to work in a full time job and they still can’t save any money.
It’s only 1300 kilometers, yet Life is drastically different.

One of the most impactful conversations I had was with a guy I met in a park during my first foreign trip, a vacation in the Netherlands (2018)

Since I’ve never been on a vacation outside Hungary, everything was new to me. Absolutely everything.
We were chilling in a park in Amsterdam with my friend who invited me, when I asked for a lighter from a couple who was sitting next to me.
When I handed it back, we started chatting and it turns out they were just chilling under the sun after a night out of doing all the drugs you can imagine.
There was, however, one crucial exchange in the conversation that made me very pissed, while simultaneously planting a seed; almost unnoticed:

[Me]: “How many countries you’ve been in?“
[Him]: *starts counting* (…) “I don’t know, around 14. Oh wait! I was also in (…) so around 16 or 17.“

The guy couldn’t even remember how many countries he has seen.

This was my first ever vacation outside Hungary, and both of us were 21 years of age.
1 vs 17.

And I still wouldn’t have been able to make this trip without my friend who invited me.
It was simply “impossible” financially.

In hindsight, that was probably the very first domino in the line that led to the decision (& action!) to move here.
Now it’s been almost 2 years.

One question you might have is:
“How did you survive for 1 year without [officially] working, and still be able to live?“

Let’s jump into it:

£ ¥ € $ Finances: $ € ¥ £

First of all, there are only 3 things I have to pay: Food, Rent and Health Insurance.
The basic necessities of a Western Human being.

I’m sustaining myself by making audio files for interesting Reddit pics.
They will eventually appear in YouTube videos, for which the owner gets ad revenue, then he pays me.
Simple outsourcing. [Look it up if you’d like to sell your time digitally]
It pays for the groceries and a portion of the rent.

Besides that, I
– Polish the Ferraris of a Dutch Millionaire (and sometimes clean & maintain his garden)
– Hunt for jobs, upload and update them in a database and apply for the ones that match the needs of my former Landlord – a programmer from Ukraine (+ cleaning his house when he is too busy)
– Massage Martial Artists and people who do heavy trainings [During Corona it’s not that easy]

These pay for the rest of the rent, allow me to buy small things here and there, and overall keep my head above the water.
The health insurance is basically paid by the government (98%)
Once again, it’s the Netherlands.

I tried applying for jobs to get some extra income and safety, but I didn’t really give my best at sending out as many as I did when I moved here in January.
Just like in the beginning of 2019, every single email came back rejecting me
(Including McDonald’s, I still remember that day.)

Even for the typical evergreen jobs where people come and go every week, like:
– Pizza/Food delivery
– Order Picking
– Cleaning/Dishwashing

No matter how fit I am, or how well I speak the language.
They wouldn’t even give a shot to me.

Quite a shame, but it has its benefits: Freedom & Risks
This reinforces the entrepreneurial way, where you get to focus on building a Life where you don’t depend/rely on anybody financially. You take all the responsibilities into your own hands, which is quite liberating.

On the other hand, of course, It comes with more risk.
To be honest, I know for a fact that I could hardly work on my dreams to cross out items on my Bucket List if I’m bogged down by the tasks and responsibilities of building someone else’s dream.

Since I was raised with Eastern-European living standards, it’s quite easy to satisfy my needs.
Basically: Good food, roof over my head and a good book with tea. Plus a touch of silliness occasionally.
This makes it a lot easier for me to survive with a little amount of money.

The things which we actually need are free for all, or else cheap; nature craves only bread and water. No one is poor according to this standard; when a man has limited his desires within these bounds.

– Lucius Annaeus Seneca

This way I can focus on developing income sources that are either online (I can work on them even if I’m traveling) like writing, or something physical I actually enjoy and pays well, like massaging.

There are 2 huge changes in this topic that happened recently:

1) A Massage Challenge
“Invite 2 people for a massage every day for a month” – An experienced friend of mine told me not so long ago.

This way I get to learn how to initiate more, plan and organize all the appointments to improve my time management, practice massaging more often, broaden my networks, strengthen my friendships and you know, perhaps earn some money.

How come it’s only “perhaps“?
Here comes the trick: Offer a session on a donation basis.

You can’t hit up all your friends and be like:
“Hey, it’s been a while. Come here and spend your money on me.“
It doesn’t work like that.

However, doing them on a donation basis – which means I’ll leave it up to them whether they would like to pay, or how much – there is no pressure from either side, and since it’s only 1 time, no one can exploit that.

I’ve been doing this for two weeks now, with a 90% “Yes” rate.
On the money side: Little to none, but multiple friends offered to redirect the people they know who have pain, so my client base will eventually broaden, and other than that: I had an opportunity to help my friends and catch up with them.

Win – win for everybody, even without gaining anything financially.

2) A Copywriting project

The Wikipedia definition can explain the term if this is the first time you stumble upon it.

Long story short, my roommate got me connected to a group of entrepreneurs who run an advertising agency, and they were looking for a good writer.
After a deeply inspiring conversation, they decided to involve me in some of their projects, helping me out by sharing their extensive knowledge and eventually offering me a place in the team to work with them.

A project popped up that was revolving around public speakers, which is one of my passions as well – so I got the task to write inspiring emails to a famous public speaker’s audience.

Luckily I’m working together with 2 already experienced writers who guide me through the process, plus support me through the pitfalls and challenges of the steep learning curve that writing brings along with itself.

This will eventually turn into a skill that I can apply in the digital world, without being restricted to a location (an office, for example) and bring some coins in, to fund the crazy ideas & dreams I want to accomplish – like eating ice cream in the middle of a desert or taking a banana for a walk with Tim Ferris.

That concludes the financial part of 2020, let’s move on to the Blog topics.

The Blog & Bucket List:

Writing is challenging.

If you’ve ever tried to express a wonderful idea of yours with a pen on paper – or with a keyboard and a word document – you know how difficult it can be to connect the pieces.

Yet, while I’m writing these lines, the letters are basically pouring on my screen without any agony or distress. Mainly because I wanted to address many of these topics already, but I didn’t know how.
In my head the blog was a source and collection of inspiring stories, and I didn’t want to “ruin” this image by writing in a more raw, organic style like this.

How silly. It removes so many barriers and limits that kept me from writing.

As you can see, if you ignore a problem long enough, it’ll keep growing until you can‘t afford to ignore it.

For this reason, there are a couple of important (Bucket List) stories I still haven’t published, even though they are crucial in terms of fulfilling the purpose of the Road to a New Life page.

I managed to cross out #92, #99, progress with #2 and start the long ass journey of #52 and #61

#92 – Explore a Foreign City with Balázs (2020.07.14 – Balázs)
We had a wonderful time in Amsterdam with my close Friend who was my masseur pair in Medical School.

There are notes and paragraphs scribbled down, but I had a hard time finishing them.
Now it’s been 5 months since that happened.
Worst case scenario: I’ll do it again with him in another City and write about that ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

#99 – Take my Parents on a Vacation in 2020 (2020.08.20 – Dad & Mom)
They spent 10 days in the Netherlands, filled with emotions and experiences that led to a lot of notes, ideas and pictures – I struggled to accurately put everything on paper.

This one is still under development, I pick it up from time to time. Eventually it’ll be published

#2 – Master 5 languages
(Hungarian, English, Dutch [89%], Spanish [Currently Under Progress], French)

My Dutch improved a lot, due to a challenge of speaking Dutch for a whole month – and doing everything I can to avoid using English – + journaling in it.

Journaling in a different language is an incredibly powerful tool that teaches you how to express the thoughts that are constantly in your head, allowing you to find the right words to accurately convey what you’re thinking and feeling.

Besides that, I just finished a very thought provoking book in Dutch: Verslaafd aan Liefde (Addicted to Love) by Jan Geurtz – which strengthened my understanding of the language immensely.
It’s a beautiful book about our attitude towards people and relationships, also available in English.

Bonus tip: Read the books out loud, and try to pronounce as many words as you can correctly.
Literally the first thing Dutch people say when I switch to Dutch from English is:
“Wow, you sound like a real Dutch person! I can’t hear any accent in it!“
Which, as you can imagine, is a wonderful compliment for such a difficult language.

If you practice the correct pronunciation from the very beginning, you’ll have less (or perhaps zero) trouble with making it sound more “original” or “real”.

These are my key take-aways so far after becoming fluent in 3 languages without spending a penny on teachers, masterclasses and all those kind of things.

You can learn a language under such a short amount of time that you wouldn’t even believe – without spending money on material, guidance or tutoring – you just need to find the right approach that fits your needs.

I’m planning to make a Language Learning Guide for free, where I share all my experiences with language learning that I gathered over the years.
But for now, ¡Es hora de aprender Español!

#52 – Become a Chef: Make 1000 dishes – [1000/4]
Another long journey was added to the mix: Cooking 1000 dishes to master my kitchen skills.
Is it gonna take a while? Certainly, and it’s worth it!

After years of craving, I finally made my first apple pie, and it was a tremendous success!

For this one I’m also planning to create a folder where I (eventually) collect all the 1000 recipes & stories to cross it off the list.

The power of effort put into cooking is extremely underestimated on a daily basis.

I became generally more interested in food, this includes being a lot more flexible and creative with the recipes and braver with spicing. The results are mostly astonishing, and due to that, quite short lived 🙂

#61 – Master one of the Martial Arts (Get a Black Belt)
This one is Big.

My roommate introduced me to Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu (BJJ) back in January, where I attended one class which sparked my interest quite quickly.

After moving to Nijmegen in the beginning of May, I immediately joined the club and started training.
Though I’m certainly an ectomorph, which is most likely the worst body type for this kind of Martial Arts, I endlessly enjoy sparring with 90+ kilo gorillas who can tie my spine into a knot.

Due to corona trainings are currently impossible (since it’s full contact) but under the ~3 months I’ve trained there, it was a wonderful time. I had a lot of fun, and I can see myself going down on the Journey of 10+ years to earn that black belt with an ocean’s sweat, and preferably the least amount of blood and tears shed.

According to our Professor/Master, only 3 out of a 1000 person makes it through all the way to black belt.

“A black belt is just a white belt who didn’t quit“

I really like that.

I’m planning to make either a long post where I add all the updates, or make a new folder to keep track of the decade long journey that is still ahead.

For the rest, I’m very proud of how the quality of my writing improved in 2020, the difference is visible, even though I didn’t publish many stories, the ones I did got better and better compared to the early days.

“Yesterday’s me” – the only person on the world with whom we should compete with.

Now it’s time to look at the mind and the body:

Health and Well-being:

Guys, there are so many ways to relieve stress and feel better in your body.

Even a 10-15 minute meditation can turn around your whole day.
(You literally only have to sit and breathe)

Some people enjoy running, others prefer going to the gym, and there are people who love working with their body (Street Workout/Calisthenics, Gymnastics, you name it)

These keep your heart healthy, get you in shape and strengthen your body.

On the other hand, you can also choose something more relaxing:
Breathing techniques, yoga, meditating.

I’ve struggled a lot with yoga – regardless of all the benefits – but I still stretch or massage my body very regularly to keep it flexible and fluid.

Meditating, on the other hand, is a blissful thing. I did a challenge of a 15 minute meditation every day for a month, and the outcome was astonishing. The amount of mental space you get by doing these consistently is simply insane.

Now it doesn’t even cost me any effort to just sit down and meditate, sometimes a whole hour goes by until I finish, and the joy of those moments of mindfulness and peace is simply invaluable in the midst of these crazy days.

If that’s something you have no interest in, you can still check out breathing techniques, for example The Ice Man, Wim Hof’s method.

It’s my ultimate go-to when I’m having a hard time dealing with everything that’s been going, both externally and internally.
[I’d put a link here that explains it, but neither the articles nor the videos are unbiased, so I encourage you to do your own digging]

Next to that: Cold Showers. It’s an unbeatable plan B.

It might be hard to imagine yourself switching from warm water to cold after a long day, but the benefits far outweigh the price you pay for it. Besides, you don’t have to do it all the time, it’s just good to have in your toolkit when you feel stressed or you need a mood-boost throughout the day.

The last thing is the simplest, yet it might require the most discipline:
Good. Quality. Sleep.

Having a stable sleeping rhythm where you give yourself the opportunity to sleep ~8 hours every day, in addition to avoiding food and screens before bedtime is immensely rewarding.

It basically cured and revived me from issues that were haunting me all year. It’s crazy how we sometimes seek a solution in all the possible ways, until it suddenly turns out that the answer was right in front of us since the beginning.

The book Why We Sleep from Matthew Walker explains the importance of sleep in the greatest detail, I certainly recommend skimming through it once – so you know exactly what happens if you do the opposite.

By doing ANY of these consistently, your well-being will significantly increase – and along with that, many others things correlated to it.

With that being said, it is my greatest pleasure to finish off with the last topic of 2020:

Failures & Mistakes:

Nobody is perfect, that’s clear.

However, if you mess the same thing up twice, there is a chance that you didn’t fully examine the issue in detail.

When the same approach doesn’t bring you the desired results or benefits, it is certainly a good idea to look for other angles that might be more effective at getting what you need.

Sticking to the “good old way” of doing something could be safe, but then you’ll never know whether there is a better way of doing it.

Also:

“Doing more of what doesn’t work doesn’t work”

– Nathaniel Branden

1) One Arm Handstand

I’ve been trying to get there since 2015. More than 5 years passed, and I still can’t do it.

Why?

I’m not putting enough effort in.
It would be more than possible for me to learn it, but I’m simply not doing the necessary things to get there.

It’s strange how easy it is to not achieve something that could be done relatively well with some consistency.

Without a plan, training schedule and specific exercises, it’s basically impossible to accurately measure the progress and figure out what are the weak spots to develop the next steps.

Even if I do some research on how to get there, write a workout plan in a word document and start doing it step by step, in 2 weeks I lose interest and never follow up with that plan.

The joy and the excitement is just not there.
Without a strong enough desire, it’s unlike to happen.

Maybe it’s time to look for a training partner?

2) Spanish [/French]

At the beginning of the year, I set the goal to bring my French to a B1 level – starting from scratch.

Since I already learned Dutch under less than a year, I thought it’ll take around the same time with French if I use the same techniques.

It may very well could have been that way, but the same issue arose here:
I’m not putting enough effort in, due to lack of excitement, interest or pleasure in learning.

As I said in the beginning, it’s so good and easy to live here, that I lost a huge portion of my ambition to do these things.

Besides, Dutch was essential when I came. French is by no means “relevant” on a daily basis.
That removes the need and the urgency to learn it.

My attempts at learning it led to insignificant progress due to lack of commitment, but the time kept passing, making the deadline rush towards me like those bullet trains in Japan.

The result is that I didn’t learn any French under the whole year, even though I had nothing but time, due to being free from a full-time job that would use up most of my time and energy.

I had the idea to start with Spanish, since I already have some friends from Latin America and Spain, so it’d be more applicable and relevant, and perhaps even more exciting.
That didn’t work either.

No effort, no interest. 0 progress in picking up a 4th language.

At least my other 3 is quite solid.
In 2021 we’ll add that 4th one to the mix!

3) The Blog & Writing

My goal for this year was to Publish 60 articles and stories – to start giving some support and value, and not just entertaining things.

Well, this is gonna be the 30th; 50% fulfilled.

Now that I’ve discovered that it’s possible to give updates and address things in a tone like this, I’m more comfortable expressing ideas without so many bars to hit, like in the usual storytelling theme.

More flexibility means easier content creating, which will eventually lead to a great load of articles where I’ll address language learning, sports and training, making money, communicating and many other topics that would significantly improve your Life quality, if you used those tips and tricks mentioned in it.

Thank you very much being with me on this long and crazy journey in 2020!

For those of you who made it this far, here is a silly treat:

• 

• 

Have a wonderful New Year!

Take care,
Erik

2020.12.21 – Day 700